She was there, standing not ten feet in front of him, reporters crowding around her, close enough for him to see the spattering of freckles across her nose, yet farther away from him than she had ever been. The gap between them was growing, and he had no idea how to bridge it. Everything he tried failed. She would talk to him when she had to, when others were around it was almost as if nothing had transpired between them, almost. But, when they were alone, when they were rarely alone, he corrected, it was always painfully obvious that she'd rather be anywhere but with him. The harder she fought to get away, the more steps he was determined to take to keep her. He couldn't let her go. He wouldn't let her go. Not now, not when he was so close to having everything. He would fight; dirty, fair, he was past the point of caring, but he would fight to keep her.

Ignoring the knot in his stomach, the pounding at the base of his skull, he approached her, knowing by the way her warm blues eyes chilled, the exact moment she saw him. Taking a chance, he hugged her; sure she would never cause a scene in front of all these people. He could do here, what she would no longer allow when they are alone. Drawing in her softness, her scent, he wished, for the millionth time, that things were as they used to be. That he still had the right to hug her, take her hand, or wrap his arm around her shoulder as they walked, like he once had.

Those times were gone, now all he could do was hug her quickly, then move away. She would not tolerate anything more than that, not from him.

Together they walked down the long hall towards her dressing room. It felt as if there were miles, not inches separating them. Speaking quickly, when they reached the door, he followed her inside, shutting out both Joel and Sandy.

All pretenses of courtesy vanished with the click of the latch. He sighed, reaching out to her. "Caitlyn."

She flinched, and the hand he had been reaching out to her with dropped to his side. "Are we ever going to get past this?"

"No." Moving to the opposite side of the room, she needed as much space between as possible, Caity turned to study the tall, handsome man in front of her. She had loved him once; he had been a person she would have described, as being crucial to her well being, her life, almost in the same way her family was. Now, all she wanted was for him to be gone.

The thought of him touching her made her shiver, it became harder and harder each day for her to hide her true feelings. She had gone from love, to hate, to now being empty. She didn't want to cry anymore, when she thought of the things that he had done, she no longer wished things could be different; she merely wanted it to be over. He wouldn't allow that. No matter where she turned, he was there. She could go for long periods of time without thinking about him. When she didn't have to see, or talk to him, she was fine. She could hide the animosity, she felt towards him, from others when he wasn't there, but she was having, an increasingly harder time, doing that when she had to be in his presence. She was beginning to fear, that some enterprising reporter somewhere, was going to pick up on it and then she was going to have to answer questions she was in no way prepared to answer. Ignoring him, she sat at the makeup table, needing to prepare for the fan club meeting she had in less than thirty minutes. When he placed his hand on her shoulder, she spun violently away.

"Don't touch me."

He held up his hand in surrender, then indicated the couch behind him. "Could you please, come sit so that we can talk?"

"No."

His reached her quickly, his long stride eating up the distance between them. Grasping her by the shoulders, he shook her, " I'm sorry. I made mistakes, I know I hurt you, but Caity we've shared so much together, we used to be close. Why can't you get past this, why can't you let it go?"

"Why don't you, let go of my sister, before I come over there and make you?"

"Marc!" Taking advantage of Brian's surprise at the interruption, and moving away, Caity, her heart pounding, trembled when his strong arms wrap around her.

"You okay?" he asked softly, his eyes never leaving the other man.

Her hesitant nod had him pulling away, so that he could get a good look at her. Her cheeks were flooded with color, her eyes, bright with tears; she tried, but failed to smile reassuringly at him. His blood began to boil at the paleness of her skin, and his eyes snapped to Brian. "I just ran into JC out in the hall," he told her, his voice calm, in great contrast to the emotion swirling through him. "I think he's going to pace a rut in the floor if you don't get out there soon." Her weak chuckle had him looking down at her. "Why don't you go on out, see if maybe you can give him something else to do?"

She hesitated, looking from him to Brian, then back again. "Come with me?" she pleaded, holding out her hand to him.

"I'll be out in few minutes, Cait. You go on and find JC, before you have to go to your fan meeting." He touched her cheek, gently, when she hesitated. "It'll be okay. Go." He watched her, until she was safely out the door, then turned back to Brian.

"The only thing, stopping me from kicking your ass right now, is that I don't want to upset her further. If you and I were truly alone Brian, you wouldn't still be standing."

"You know what Marc, I really don't have time for you right now." His shock was unmistakable, when Marc's hand shot out to grab his lapel, as he tried to walk past.

"That's just to damn bad isn't it, because I have a few things I want to say to you, Brian, and you're going to listen."

"Get your fucking hands off me Marc! Who the hell do you think you are?" Slamming him against the wall, Marc gave a satisfied grunt ,when the air left Brian's body in a loud whoosh!

"Never mind who the fuck I think I am Brian, who the fuck do you think you are?" His air supply cut off, by the arm that was pressed, firmly, against his throat; the only reply he was able to make, was a wheezing groan.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Marc drawled sarcastically, "can't you breathe Bri?" Pushing his face into the other man's, he pulled his lips back, in a feral grin. "You feeling a little hemmed in Brian, maybe like things aren't quite in your control. You don't like the feel of having someone play with your life, do you asshole? Well, guess what Bri, I don't much care what you like or don’t like at this moment. Right now my concern is my sister." Shoving his arm harder against Brian's throat, when he tried to push him away, Marc snarled. "I'm putting you on notice right now, you son of a bitch, if you keep screwing with my sisters life, I'm going to make you sorry you're alive. Because Brian, if you and I have to have this conversation again, I can guarantee you, you won't be standing when it's over."

The anger coursing through his body made dropping his arm from Brian's throat hard, but the satisfaction he felt when the other man slid weakly down the wall, more than made up for it.

He wanted to beat him to a pulp. He could clearly imagine how it would feel to smash his fist into his face. The only thing holding him back was Cait. No matter what Brian did, she would never approve of those kinds of tactics, in dealing with him. That was what made her so vulnerable to a manipulator like him, she cared, even after all he had done, some part of her still cared.

Otherwise, no matter how much money it would cost her, he'd be gone. She felt she owed him something, so she would never publicly humiliate him by firing him as her manager, instead she would continue to tolerate an intolerable situation, so that in the end it could be said it was a mutual decision for Brian to move on. It was one of the things about his sister he loved the most, her compassion for others. Right now, looking at the man in front of him, he wished she had a little less of it. He'd love nothing more, at this moment, than to be able to help rearrange Brian's pretty face for him. Instead, he held his hand out to the man, prepared to help him to his feet.

He merely shrugging when Brian angrily swatted it away.

"Suit yourself, Bri. If you want to sit on the floor, who am I to stop you." Squatting so their eyes were level, he studied the face of a man, he had once considered a friend. "What happened to you Brian," he asked, his voice tinged with regret. "Did you get greedy, is that what it is? Is the money so important to you that you're willing to sacrifice Caity's happiness for it?" He received no answer to either of his inquiries, only a blank stare. "Whatever. You obviously don't have to talk to me, but make no mistake here Brian, you do have to leave Cait and JC alone. He makes her happy, and as much as you're willing to do, to see them apart, I'm going to do twice as much to see that they make it." At the door he turned, "And Brian, so is JC. If you think what you have here, is another person who's as easily manipulated as Kyle was, you've seriously underestimated your opponent."

"We'll just see about that, Marc." Brian his cell phone in hand, began dialing as soon as March walked through the door. He was more than prepared to put the next phase of his plan in motion. As the line began to ring, he smiled, "We'll just see about that."

She had walked out of the room and into JC's arms. Now, a full five minutes later, her tremors had finally ceased, though she had yet to say a word. Joel, seeing her state when she had walked out of the room, had quickly led them to an unoccupied office. They were seated on an old sofa against the far wall, in exactly the same position as they had been when JC had first sat down, Caity cradled in his lap, her face buried against his neck. She hadn't cried, she had only held on as if her life had depended on it. He almost wished that she had shed tears. Maybe then, she wouldn't have shaken as if she were so cold she would never be warm again. She was, he knew, holding way too much in. It was only a matter of time before she snapped. He was going to do everything in his power to make sure that didn't happen. If she wouldn't, or couldn't, talk to him about what was churning through her, maybe there was another way for him to help her channel her emotions.

Continuing the soothing circular motion of his hand against her back, he touched his lips gently to her forehead, her temple, her cheek, leaving a moist trail in his wake until finally, finally, his lips touched hers. Their sighs mingled when he gently cupped the back of her head with one hand, her cheek with the other. Increasing the pressure of the kiss, his body flooded with warmth.

God, why was it every time his lips touched hers it felt like coming home, he wondered. It was like jumping off a cliff, yet feeling completely safe as you fell. He felt whole as he lowered her slowly to the couch, covered her body with his. Sinking into her softness, he felt all the pieces click into place. He was complete when he was with her. No one had ever filled all the empty places in his soul like she could; no one had ever made him feel like this.

The timing was awful, the setting less than perfect, but he could no longer hold all that he felt inside him. Easing back, only enough so that he could see her face, he waited until her eyes slowly fluttered open. Cupping her face in his hands, he ran his thumb slowly back and forth over her cheekbone. He wanted to permanently etch this moment in his mind, his heart, because he knew, as much as he had ever known anything, that with his next words his life would be forever changed.

"I love you, Caity." He knew the moment his words registered, he could feel her body, first stiffen, then soften beneath his. Her heart began to pound against his chest, her eyes filled, then overflowed, the joy in them a balm to his soul.

She loved him too. Before the words ever left her lips, he knew. But, it still, when she said the words, "I love you too, Josh," took his breath away. The feeling was so immense, it overwhelmed him.

"God, Caity." When he enfolded her body with strong arms, it was his turn to tremble, hers to soothe. It was she who used her lips to calm, she who lovingly dried his cheeks when they become one, and it was she who again whispered, "I love you," when they flew off the edge of the earth together.

"You look different." Eyes travelling over Caity, trying to pinpoint exactly what was different, Dani took in her friends' sunny smile, her sparkling eyes. "You're almost," she paused, searching for the right word. "Glowing," she finally came up with, then realized it was true. She was glowing.

"I'm excited to finally be starting the tour." Adjusting her left ear-piece, she smiled innocently, when her friend snorts in disbelief.

"Lady, I've known you for fourteen years and I've been touring with you for the last four, you've never looked like this before a show." Bending so that she could look up into Cait's face when she ducked her head, she laughed at the blush staining her friend's cheeks. "Caitlyn Marie Michaels, what have you been up to?"

Again telling her, that it was only her excitement over this first show, that Dani was seeing she didn't realize her dreamy eyes and soft smile gave her away. Granted, to the casual observer, yes, she would look like she was excited, happy, but Dani knew better. Something had happened, and she was determined to find out what. Turning back to Cait, she realized it would be pointless now, to try to get anything out of her, she had gone off into her own little world.

Her mind was, indeed, somewhere else. It had taken her back to that little room. If she closed her eyes, she could feel him, as if they were still lying there together. His warmth, the weight of his body, the way his soft breath had felt on her cheek as they had slowly drifted back to earth. She had been twenty minutes late for her fan-club meeting, something she had never done before, but she had no regrets. Those stolen moments with JC, what they had shared, was more precious than anything she had ever known. She wouldn't trade it for all the candlelight, linen sheets, or soft beds, the finest hotels had to offer. In her mind, it had been perfect. The only thing that had marred it, was that they had had such a short period of time together. They had been sitting, quietly holding each other, when Sandy had knocked on the door. She was getting a raise, it didn't matter that she had only worked for her for a short period of time, she deserved it. Caity was well aware,, that it had been Sandy who had kept everyone away from that room, that it had been Sandy who had gone in, talked to the fans, explained that the delay was because of Caity's lateness in getting to the arena. If there had been any ruffled feathers, Caity would not have known it. Sandy had taken care of everything.

Sandy was also, along with Mari and Dani, moving to a different bus for tonight. Tonight Caity needed, no wanted, to be alone. No that wasn't true, she wouldn't be alone, JC would be with her. They had talked about it just before she had left. He had asked if she would stay, wait for him to finish his show. Originally, the plan had been for Caity and her crew to leave first, immediately after her show was over. Once the tour was under way, and some of the kinks had been worked out, most nights they would be staying to watch the others perform, especially when they were in a city where they had more than one show. But, it had long ago been decided, that this first night, her buses would leave first. It would be chaotic enough without adding the headache of getting her people; as well as NSync's moving at the same time. Brian and Johnny didn't know it yet, but while the remainder of Caity's crew would be leaving immediately after the show, she, Dani, Sandy, Mari, Joel and one of the other bodyguards would be staying behind.

It was sure to make Brian extremely unhappy, but she didn't care. Brian's happiness or lack thereof was not something that she was concerned with. JC had told her he would in-list the guys' help in dealing with Johnny, that she was not to worry about him. Her brother Marc would also be staying behind, he would take JC's place on the bus with Justin, as normally have been with Cait. JC had been sure, as Justin and Marc had been playing basketball with one another earlier in the day, they wouldn't mind that arrangement. He was staying with them through the show in Nashville, and then she would see him again, four days later, in Atlanta. Her whole family would be there for those two shows. Then Marc would come down for the weekend to see the show in Orlando, they would have plenty of time together.

Hearing Steve say her name, she realized her portion of the show was about to begin. Grinning at Dani, then Mar, she moved into her pose, waiting for the music to start. Though he had warned her against excessive movement of her knee, she could not jump or do any dances that required a great deal of intricate movement, her doctor had said that she could manage some minor moves. This song was one she planned on dancing to. Placing the black bowler hat on her head, she dipped her chin, the fingers of her right hand resting lightly on the brim. Hearing the explosions that would flood the stage with smoke, covering her entrance to the stage, she bent her right knee, her heart beating in time with the music. One, two, three and then the spotlight hit her and she was on. Everything else left her mind, and as JC watched from the side of the stage, his Caity was replaced with Caitlyn Michaels, "pop-star".

She worked the audience, and if he wasn't mistaken, borrowed a few of those hip movements she teased Justin about. From the moment she tipped the hat off her head, allowing her long, blonde hair to spill free, to the last note of the song, she never stopped moving, never stopped playing the crowd. Though he had long been a fan of her voice, this was the first time he had ever seen her perform live. She was amazing, and dressed in a short black leather skirt, metallic red bandeau top, and cropped black leather jacket, she literally took his breath away.

Sensing a presence next to him, he looked over into Justin's huge grin.

"I taught her everything she knows," Justin joked, when she repeatedly pumps her hips during "Honey", the third song in her set.

JC merely smiled, his attention on the woman on stage. He knew the order of her songs by heart, he had watched her at rehearsals enough, but watching her walk through them was entirely different than what he was seeing now. She totally blew him away, even without her being able to fully perform the dance routines, she was amazing. By the time she finished the fourth song, and had gone back for a costume change, the others had joined he and Justin stage-side.

Nudging Joey with his elbow, Chris pointed to JC's face. Then they both burst into laughter.

"What is wrong with you two?" Justin wants to know.

"Oh, we're just wondering why JC looks so, ummmm, satisfied, I'd say. Would that be the word you'd use Joe?" Chris laughed.

"Yeah, satisfied. That's a good one. So what about it, C? What's up, want to share why you're walking around with that stupid grin on your face?"

Realizing what's happened, as soon as he caught sight of a guilty faced Lance, JC groaned. "You told them! Lance, how could you tell them?"

"I didn't mean to. They just, they….argh! They acted like they knew, I didn't know until after I started telling them that they didn't."

"Knew what? What's everyone talking about?" Confused, Justin looked to JC for an answer.

"Nothing J, they're not talking about anything. Look here's Caity again. Isn't this one of your favorite songs?" he asked, hoping to distract him.

His attention reverted to the stage, Justin forgot for a moment about the others. "Heart", the song Caity was singing now, was from one of her first albums and Justin's favorite song.

He had never told any of them this, but when he had been twelve, he'd had an enormous crush on Caity. She had been a brand new artist then, he can still remember lying on his bed mooning over the cover picture on her album. God, he would die if any of the others ever found out. They would never let him live it down. He was sure they never would, he hadn't told anyone, well except for…oh no…Lance, he had told Lance. He'd kill him, if Lance ever so much as breathed a word to the others, he'd kill him. Studying his friend, he didn’t think that he had anything to worry about.

Whatever Lance had done to earn him JC's wrath, Justin knew he could depend on him, to keep whatever they talked about under wraps. After all, he knew just as many secrets about Lance that he could use if it came to that.

Most recently, what Lance was thinking about Dani. Justin sure hoped he knew what he was doing there. She was a pretty lady, and he liked her, but she was one cool customer. He hoped Lance didn't get hurt, though according to Lance, she wasn't letting him anywhere near close enough for that to happen.

Dancing along with Joey, when the music to another of his older favorites, "Love Will Find a Way" began playing, he forgot all about Lance and his secret for a time. Later, laughing with the others over Joey's antics, he wandered closer to Lance, just as Caity left the stage for another costume change.

"Hey Scoop, what were they teasing C about before?" he asked, making no effort to hide his curiosity.

"No way. Don't even ask me that. I'm already in enough hot water with JC. If you want to know what it was about, ask him."

"But, everyone knows but me," Justin whined, playing on Lance's sense of fair play.

"Nope sorry, it's not going to work J. If you really feel that you need to know, you're going to have to ask JC. Now leave me alone, I want to watch the show." Striding over to where Chris and Joey were standing, Lance left Justin pouting alone.

Justin determined to find out, moved closer to JC. He stopped short, however, at the look on JC's face when Caity moved back onto the stage. He looked, as if, someone had punched him in the stomach. He'd inhaled sharply when he'd seen her, and he had that look, that look that guys get when they want to…when they want to…"Oh no way, you didn't." he growled, startling JC. "You slept with her."

"Justin shut up." Looking around, making sure no one overheard J's heated comment, JC placed his hand on Justin's shoulder, only to have it shrugged, violently, off.

"You slept with her," he accused, his face fierce.

"Justin, what the hell is wrong with you?" Clearly bewildered, JC looked to Lance for help. When Justin brushes Lance off as well, JC frowned.

"J, you knew Caity and I were a couple. What are you freaking out about? Couples make love, Justin," His voice was quiet, his tone serious. "Your obviously not a little kid, you know that."

"Don't talk to me like I'm two, Josh."

That's when JC knew, exactly, how upset Justin truly was. He never called him that, ever. "What the hell is going on with you, J?"

"How could you do that? How could you do that with her and then, then tell them about it. She deserves better than that."

His temper perilously close to the surface, JC drew air deeply into his lungs. "J, I told Lance that I was in love with Caity. That was it, nothing else. But, even if I did tell him something more, Justin, that's my business, not yours."

"You're in love with her? That's what they were teasing you?" Hanging his head, Justin grinned sheepishly. "I'm sorry JC, I saw the way you just looked at her, and then Chris had said you looked satisfied, and I..."

"And you jumped to conclusions. Not very nice ones either, I might add. If Cait and I have that type of relationship, you can rest assured I won't be sharing it with the four of you. Especially, if this is how you're all going to react to it. What's up with that anyway J, why such a violent reaction?"

Shrugging, Justin avoided JC's direct stare, looking instead to the stage. "She's like my sister, I guess." He mumbled, making it hard for JC to hear. "I mean, how would you like it, if I were having sex with your sister?"

Eyebrows raised, JC frowned. "I'd kick your skinny butt from here to Florida." He laughed along with the others, "But, this is different. Caity and I love each other, it wouldn't just be sex. And she's a big girl, somehow, I doubt she'd appreciate you butting in, or this entire conversation for that matter."

"I guess. I'm sorry, I just thought you had and then told everyone."

Touched by his deep affection for Cait, and happy to know that at least Justin and the others will accept their being together, he grabbed Justin around the neck, briefly wrestling with him. "Thanks."

"For what, being stupid?"

"No, for looking after my lady for me." Hugging him, he ruffled his curls, making Justin squirm.

"Damn, what is it with you people and my hair. Why can't you leave it alone?" Smiling, as he complained, "Can we please watch the show now?" He nudged JC with his elbow. A look of understanding passed between them, before they both turned back to the stage and Cait.

"Oh God, did you see Chris's face when that girl took her shirt off and threw it at him?" Settling back against the solid warmth of JC's chest, Caity rubbed a hand over her aching stomach, sighing contentedly, when his hand replaced hers.

"I thought Mari was the one who's face was comical. I happened to look over at you guys right then. She looked like she wanted to hurt that girl."

Laughing again Caity groaned, pressing his hand against her sore middle. "Stop, I can't laugh anymore, it hurts." They had been sitting here like this, since N Syncs show had ended and they had boarded her bus. JC had taken a quick shower while she had changed clothes and now both of them were in their "jammies" snuggled on Cait's bunk in the back of the bus.

Unlike some of the other buses, Caity's had a "bedroom" in the very back. It could be, and often was, used as a lounge when others were on board, but at night, this was where Cait slept. She had never really been able to sleep in the smaller, more confined traditional bunks that most of the buses had, so when she had become more popular, she had had a bus designed with a bedroom just for her. This room, was where she spent the bulk of her time while on the road. It had a well-equipped entertainment system, as well as storage space for her clothing and things.

She had made it her temporary home by bringing along her favorite pictures of her family and friends. She also had, recessed slots put in the shelf that ran along the back wall, so that she could have candles there. They were deep and even with the top of the shelf so that there was no fear of the bus making a sudden jerk and them toppling over. She was extremely careful and they were never allowed to burn unless she was in the room, awake, with them. They were burning now, illuminating the room with their soft glow. JC had turned on the stereo, picking out several CD's when he had entered the room, so that soft music played in the background. It was peaceful, she thought, settling her head in the crook of his shoulder, being here like this. The hum of the wheels on the road, the soft music, candlelight, his warmth, as well as the gentle sound of his soft, even breathing, lulled Caity into a feeling of pleasant drowsiness.

"Are you falling asleep on me?" The brush of his lips against her ear, as he asked his question, made her shiver.

"Mmm, sorry. I guess I was." Shifting in his arms, so that she was lying on her side, she asked. "Aren't you tired?"

"No, not really. I'm still a little wired, I guess. It takes me a while, sometimes, to relax after a show."

"I know the feeling. I expect that it's harder with the type of show you guys do, though. I don't think you stopped for more than 10 minutes the whole time. Did I mention to you, that I thought you guys were amazing?"

Smiling down at her, he teased, "Only about a hundred times. If you don't stop I'm going to get big headed."

"Going to get?" She inquired cheekily, then squealing, hurried to move away from his tickling.

Breathless, after a full five minutes of wrestling, she yelled "Uncle! Oh god, don’t make me laugh anymore, my poor stomach."

"I like to hear you laugh, you haven't done much of that lately."

Smoothing her hand over his cheek, then into his hair she drew him close for a sweet kiss. "That's because," she said while pulling away, "you weren't there."

"Even when we talked on the phone, you were so quiet and serious." Searching her face before he continued, he remembered the many phone calls between Mississippi and Orlando. Phone calls that had left him feeling hollow, because he had known that he should have been there with her, not five thousand miles away. "I should have come home. I knew you were feeling overwhelmed, that you needed me there, and I should have come home." Rushing to get it out, he stumbled over what he wanted to say, "I just didn't, I mean I couldn't." Shaking his head in frustration, he stilled when she placed a finger against his lips.

"I know, it's okay, I know."

"Caity." His voice was gruff when he said. "I don't know why you put up with me."

"I love you." To her it was as simple as that. She loved him.

"That's it? How can that be it? I mean," Raking his hands through his hair, he groaned, "I can't talk tonight, I swear. What I'm trying to ask is, how can you forgive me just like that?"

"Forgive you for what, Josh? What did you do that was so bad?"

"I wasn't there when you needed me to be. You said it yourself Cait, I should have come home without you having to tell me to."

Lying her forehead against his chest, she remembered their phone conversation from yesterday.

"Did it ever, once, occur to you, that maybe you should have come without my having to tell you to?"

She had been angry, had thrown that comment at him specifically to make him feel guilty, apparently she had succeeded. "Josh," she kissed his chin, hugging him to her. "I know I said that, but I was angry and frustrated at the time. I say things, sometimes, that I shouldn't when I'm feeling that way."

"I thought when you hung up last night, that you hated me." His softly uttered words, had her sharply raising her head.

"No, no, no. How could I ever hate you?" The very idea, that he had spent last night feeling that way, broke her heart. "I could never hate you."

"Promise?" He asked, kissing her.

"Promise."

"Come here." Settling her against his chest, he sighed in contentment. "I think I could get used to this," he spoke, after a long silence.

"Me too."

"Maybe we could talk Justin and the girls into sharing a bus, then we could be roomies."

"Somehow, I can't see either Johnny or Brian going for that."

"Screw Brian." Tossing the covers aside, he rose, moving over to the stereo.

Her dry, "Thanks, but I'd rather not," had him turning back to her. Pulling her off the bed, he drew her against him.

"He's not going to leave us alone, you know that right?"

"What can he do, JC? I mean, I know technically he is still my manager, and in front of other people I have to act that way, but he has no real control anymore."

"No, not over your career maybe, but when I just mentioned us sharing a bus, his was one of the first names you mentioned."

She had, immediately, thought of Brian's reaction to what JC had said, she realized, "It's kind of automatic still, I guess. He's been involved in decisions about my career for so long, it's going to take a little while for me to stop thinking like that."

When she sat on the edge of the bed, patted the space beside her, he hesitated first, then sat.

"Talk to me Josh, tell me what you're thinking."

"I'm thinking, that he still has more of a hold on you than I'm entirely comfortable with. I'm thinking, that he's not going to just quietly walk away in October, and I'm thinking that you're maybe a tad blind where Brian is concerned."

She stiffened at his words, but when she went to move away, he stopped her.

"You asked."

"My mistake." Turning away, she settled back under the covers. "I'm tired JC, I need to get some sleep."

Scrubbing his hands over his face, he debated letting it go, but only for a second. They had both been avoiding this issue for way to long, and he was determined to bring it out in the open. So, stretching out beside her, he decided to make her talk about it, once and for all. "Caity, he's in love with you, he's not going to give up that easily."

Those words, that sentence, took her breath away. She could, literally, feel the blood drain from her face. "Nooo," she moaned when she could again breathe, "No!" But she knew, even as she denied it, that it was true.

"Yes." Turning her onto her back, he forced her to look at him. "Yes, Caity, he is. You don't think, all of this is because, he's afraid of how you and I being together is going to affect your career, do you?"

"That's exactly," she stopped, leaving the thought unfinished when she met his patient gaze. "God ,what a mess." Seeking peace, she burrowed against him. "How did I let this happen?"

"Baby, look at me. Look at me," he repeated when she wouldn't budge. When her troubled eyes finally rose to meet his, he touched his lips to her forehead. "You aren't responsible for Brian's feelings, Cait."

"But…"

"No buts. You have no control over what he does or doesn't feel. Somewhere along the line, his feelings for you changed, you had no way of knowing that was going to happen. I think now though, now that you know, we need to figure out what we're going to do about it."

"How can we do anything about it? I mean I can't tell him he's not allowed to feel like that, and I've never, ever, remotely acted like I've felt the same." Struggling to take it in, Caity felt like crying. "I mean, I've told him in the past that I loved him, but like I tell Marc, or Colin. I've never, in any way, acted like I wanted him in that way."

"I don't think you had too, Cait. People fall in love, for whatever reason, they do. You didn't need to encourage it, it just happened."

"Poor Brian."

"How can, after all he's done, you say "poor Brian"?"

"Josh, I hate what he's done. I will never feel the same way about him again, but he's been a big part of my life for a long time. I can still find it in me to feel badly for him."

"No, you can't." Eyes fierce, he cupped her chin firmly in his hand. "You can't afford to feel sorry for him, because he'll use it against you. He'll use it against us." He corrected; his face set in firm lines. "He's shown that he's willing to hurt you, Cait, to get what he wants, you need to be careful."

Smiling, for the first time since they had begun talking about this, she touched his hand. "Honey, Brian may be manipulative, but he would never physically hurt me. He's a lot of things, violent isn't one of them."

He could see that she truly believed that, and his tension eased a bit at the conviction he saw in her eyes. He'd been a little worried that Brian could do just that, if provoked. "You're sure?"

"I'm very sure. He's not that kind of man. He's always been, as I said, willing to do things to manipulate the situation to where he wants it to be, but never in a physical way."

"Okay, but I still want you to be careful."

"I will, I promise. And as for what we're going to do about him, I think us doing this, talking about him, making sure we keep each other aware of what's going on, will go a long way to stopping anything he has planned. Though honestly, I can't see what he could do at this point, can you?"

"It's the thought of what he could do, that bothers me." Easing down onto the bed, he willed the tension out of his body, when she snuggled against him. "I want you to promise me that you'll talk to me if you think he's up to something." Raising her chin with his finger, so that they were eye to eye, he repeated, "Promise?"

"I promise. If I think he's up to no good, you'll be the first to know."

"Good." Molding her body to his, he nibbled along the sensitive underside of her jaw. "Now, it occurs to me that the this afternoon, while incredible, was a little rushed and I could probably do better. What do you think?"

Her breathless, "I think I'm willing to let you try." Was all the encouragement he needed to show her that, he could indeed, do better.